Real Co-Parents: Shannon Spake
Shannon is a divorced mom with twin boys who says TalkingParents has improved her co-parenting situation with documentation and peace of mind.
- 2 min watch
- real co-parents
Shannon Spake has twin teenage boys with her ex-husband. She and her ex were married for 14 years before they separated.
“The divorce itself took about three years from the time we got separated to the time it was final. So, as you can imagine, when that much time goes by, there were a lot of emotions that came with that and a lot of arguments.”
She says while the situation started out somewhat amicable, the relationship eventually became strained.
“I think that a lot of people go into separations and divorces with the best of intentions, thinking they’re going to be able to co-parent, they’re going to be able to spend Christmases together, and those types of situations. That’s really where my ex-husband and I were when we first got separated. But unfortunately, as time goes on, and lawyers get involved, and the legal process starts to play out, you’re on different sides of that process.”
In addition to the emotional toll, Spake says documenting everything during the divorce was basically a full-time job.
“Your lawyer does a lot, but you have to do a lot for yourself too in order to get the information to your lawyer. I had calendars, I had copies of text messages chains, I had emails—everything was in a huge binder.”
Spake says she came across TalkingParents about halfway through the divorce process.
It was about a year and a half in. I was on a Facebook support group, and I saw many, many people who mentioned the TalkingParents app as, sort of, their lifeline. I thought to myself, this is a great idea to have something that can help me streamline and help me with the documentation process. That’s when I immediately signed up.
She says the documentation was and is most beneficial to her situation.
“When you have legal entities involved and it’s a ‘he said, she said’ kind of thing, you’ve got to have the legal documents to have proof. And TalkingParents absolutely does that.”
Spake says all the features have been helpful, but her favorites are Secure Messaging and the Shared Calendar.
“It’s how my ex and I communicate. And having it all live in one place where you can access it a lot easier with less time involved—it’s something that’s been invaluable.”
All in all, Spake says the most important thing has been shielding her kids.
“Making the process easier for my boys when there are so many emotionally charged conversations when it comes to their parents, the people they look up to, has been priority number one, and it’s something that my ex and I both take very seriously.”
She says TalkingParents has added that peace of mind.
“TalkingParents has sort of been the person in my corner. When you think you’re crazy or when something gets miscommunicated, and you’re like, ‘I swear I put that on the calendar, or I communicated this properly’ and it’s not received in the proper way. The TalkingParents app is that one extra layer of ‘you did it the right way, and here’s the proof.’”
Ready to sign up for TalkingParents? Get Started.